The thought manifests the word,
The word manifests the deed,
The deed develops into habit
And habit hardens into character
So watch the thought and its ways with care,
And let it spring from love
Born out of Concern for all beings…
As the shadow follows the body,
As we think,so we become.

– From the Dhammapada, Sayings of the Buddha.

I read this and It hit me like a brick.  I have had this discussion with both <lj user = gigawattwarlock> and my shrink.  Words and language are SO much more important than we ever give them credit for.  Think of it,language is so important there is a special part of the brain just to deal with it.  I think what we don’t realize is how important the words we use to OURSELVES are.

People seem to accept that when the people around  them use derogatory words toward them (you’re stupid, you can’t do anything right,you’re ugly, your fat) that these words will eventually do harm and people will eventually come to look upon them as fact.

Now, replace all the “you’s” with “I’s”.  People do this CONSTANTLY, but never seem to realize that it is MORE harmful than if others use these words.  It will sink in and become fact MUCH faster if you use the words yourself.

When I was younger, one of the churches I attended taught to me that “if you think the thought, you have already committed the sin.”  In the christian sense of things (eternal hell fire and pain) this is a scary concept.  All it really taught me is that if I’m going to hell for THINKING the thought, I may as well DO the action and get some of the pleasure from it.  If I’m going to pay the price – I may as well get my money’s worth.

In the Christian sense of things, you think the thought and get scared, think of yourself as an evil person and proceed to beat your self up and denigrate yourself in a hope that God will forgive the truly evil hateful person that you TRULY are on the inside.

I think in the Buddhist sense the lesson taught is more accurate.  If you think the thought, you have done damage.  If you think the thought enough, you will act.  The idea is to not “beat your self up” for thinking the thought.  Meditate on the thought, get to know it, find out where it comes from and why it felt the need to speak.  What did thinking that thought REALLY mean and what needs is it trying to have met.

I have also realized that this is like a seesaw, as MANY things in life are:  Cause and Effect, Karma.  The thought becomes the action – but the action becomes the thought.  There is the saying “the first time you commit murder is the hard one, it gets easy after that.”  The ACT of committing a deed will reinforce in the mind the thoughts of that deed.  Cause-effect, effect-cause.

So, in this life, you need to treat yourself right and THINK of yourself right.  Pay attention to your thoughts, when you think negatively – be a sap and make your self say positive, reaffirming words in your head.

It does seem to work.  I am an expert at self-deprecation.  I am teaching myself to become an expert on self-celebration and love.