Dated 9-February-2009

I have always found it easy to be a martyr
First of all I don’t NEED to deal with the problem
I plant my feet
I let what happens happen
I let the bad wash over me like a wave

Secondly I get to play the pity card
Oh, people of the world feel sorry for
See what has been done to me
The pain that has been heaped upon me
See me, feel me, touch me, heal me

Wait,
Skip that last part
Don’t heal me
If I’m healed you won’t feel sorry for me
You won’t love me
You won’t see the sad little boy who needs a hug

Thirdly I get to sit with myself righteousness
This was done TO me
AGAINST me
Inflicted UPON me
I couldn’t save myself
(Wouldn’t)
[Shouldn’t]
I’m in the right and I have been wronged
I have been hurt
I have been slammed

All I had to do in the first place was walk away
All I had to do was say “NO”
All I had to do was say “I don’t want this”
All I had to do was something.

But then, I wouldn’t be the martyr
You wouldn’t feel sorry for me
You wouldn’t offer me love and support
You wouldn’t be my friend

Without my pain
Or self-righteousness
To keep me company
I’d be alone